Turnbull Gets Melways To Brush Up On 'Marvellous Melbourne'

Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull has been gifted a copy of Melbourne's famous Melways roadbook of highly detailed maps in an attempt to get him to remember about other states in the Commonwealth.

A staffer within Victoria's Department of Treasury, who wants to remain anonymous, because, let's face it, giving the Prime Minister of Australia of book of maps is a real cheeky move, sent the Melways to Canberra on Wednesday morning.

A slanging match erupted in the media this week between the Federal government and the Victorian government over infrastructure spending. At a fancy lunch in a fancy hotel, Premier Daniel Andrews questioned whether Turnbull actually "knew where Victoria was."

The Andrews government in incensed by the Federal government failing to honour its own asset recycling scheme, which will short-change Victoria to the whimsical tune of $573 million. Calling Turnbull the "Prime Minster for Sydney," Andrews warned that Australia would soon face "Abbott mark 2" if Turnbull ignored the rest of Australia.

Victorians have a generalised antipathy to New South Welshmen, which is now being exacerbated by the true fact that, despite have a quarter of the nation's population, the southern state only receives 7.7% of infrastructure funding from Canberra.

Still, the facts didn't stop Turnbull telling TV legend David "Kochie" Koch that he loves Melbourne. "We love Victoria," said the Prime Minister, apparently using the royal "we" as a replacement for "I."