Ophthalmologists Concerned About Vegans’ Eyesight

The most leading, bestest, awesomest ophthalmologist in Australia (and New Zealand) has publicly expressed his concern about the eyesight of vegans in Australia (and New Zealand).

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Dr David Andrews, the CEO of the Royal Australian and New Zealand College of Ophthalmologists, or RANZCO, says everyone in Australia needs to be mindful of their eyes and the importance of their health, especially as “you can see things you otherwise wouldn’t.”

“As the CEO of the peak training body in Australia - and New Zealand - for ophthalmologists, it is my duty to educate people on the importance of eyesight,” Dr Andrews says.

“My colleagues in Australia - and New Zealand - are reporting concerning trends about their vegan patients. They no longer seem to have the ability to see grey anymore - everything to them is black and white.”

The Seagull asked Dr Andrews to elaborate on his concern. He did.

“Their ethical positions are impractical. I’m hearing stories where vegans won’t let their daughters become vaccinated with Gardasil, which is extremely effective at preventing cervical cancer, because it was tested on animals. And the same with paracetamol.”

“I totally understand their position on not drinking milk intended for baby cows and honey made from bee vomit, but not letting your kid play footy because the AFL uses leather-covered Sherrins? Come on!”

The Seagull questioned Dr Andrews as to whether vegans supposed B12 deficiency was to blame for their eyesight problems.

Said Dr Andrews: “You can just take a supplement for that. No biggie.”