Muslims Glad Straight White Dudes Taking The Heat

In what seems to be a never-ending story of Hollywood proportions, another politician has been accused of sexual misconduct.

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Melbourne Lord Mayor Robert Doyle has been accused of sexually harassing and groping former councillor Tessa Sullivan. Cr Doyle has taken one month's leave while the claims are investigated.

Whilst the news is a blow for straight white men everywhere, the development continues a period of good fortune for Australia's Muslims after a dreadful run in the media.

"We are cautiously optimistic, but hopefully we will witness the narrative changing so that people will see just bad apples in the Muslim community, rather than suspeecting all of us being terrorists," Ahmed al-Khalil, from the Australian Islamic Association, told The Seagull.

"It only takes one boneheaded comment from Pauline Hanson and we'll be back on the front pages of The Australian again, so we will wait and see."