"As If!" Local Man Disputes Neutron Stars' Collision

This morning people woke from their sleep to news on the TV that scientists across the world had observed the collision of two neutron stars.

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"Were you there?" asked Pete Worthington, 39, of Gladstone Park when The Seagull spoke to several people about this morning's news.

"I don't buy it for a second. As if!"

When The Seagull calmly explained to Pete that more than 70 observatories across the globe had witnessed the event and the LIGO detectors had felt the collision via gravitational waves, the man was still indignant.

"All youse scientists have done is nothin' ever! I still ain't got a jetpack or a flying car but you say somefin 'appened a hundred and firty miles away. Bull!"